How NOT to Get a Job - The Interview

Got an invitation to an interview? Great! Don’t screw it up.

Or you may want to follow in the footsteps of the following brilliants, all of which were vying for executive positions.

‘… didn’t mean to hide that …’

The interview proceeded for a good 10 minutes before the interviewer flipped through the application form and noticed that candidate missed a question regarding affiliation to any rival businesses. Although in that industry, disassociation in the rival upon acceptance of employment is completely acceptable, the candidate decided it best to try to hide the fact. The interview was all downhill from there.

‘Gum, anyone?’

All through the interview, she was chewing on something which seemed to be a piece of gum. Should I say more?

‘Yeah, about your offer …’

Within the first 5 minutes, the hopeless candidate said that he had already accepted an offer from another company and would be starting work there the very next week. At the end of the interview, he asked if we could make him an offer before then.

The week came and went; we never got back to him.

‘Benefits?’

Perhaps the third sentence that came out of the candidate’s mouth was ‘what benefits do you offer?’ The interview was practically over before it started.

‘Dressed for success’

Female candidate in her mid 20’s who wore a loose hanging blouse and all through the interview drawing attention every time she leaned forward (and she leaned forward a lot). Perhaps not for the position being offered where professionalism and discretion are the main criteria.

‘Let’s talk another language’

In certain countries where English is not the national language, it is still used as in business. Half way through the interview, the candidate changed from English to chattering non-stop in the local language – even after all subsequent questions were in English.

‘Your products need improvement …’

The hopeless sales executive simply said that the packaging of the company products would have to be improved, a lot, before he could start selling. Perhaps it would have been less offensive if the company had not just closed a large supply contract.

‘You guys stab each other in the back to get to the top, right?’

During question time, the candidate mentioned that he had heard that existing employees would stop at nothing to outshine everyone else – to the extent of borderline practices. The red-faced interviewer replied that it perhaps happened in other parts of the company, but not in that particular department.

You could guess what happened to the interview after that.